So I climbed the mountain. I was going to see the great sage to record a song I had just written. However, I didn’t want just anyone to record this song. Not to mention I wanted my song to have a certain sound to it. Not just any sound. The Beauville sound.
To get this sound I had to climb the mountain with all my music equipment in tow. I had to see the sage, Mr. Beauville himself, T. Shawn Kyle Beauville. Only he could get that sound that I so desperately needed.
I said, “Sage, tell me how to get to that great Beauville sound. What guitar do I need?”
He told me, “Move the cat, and have a seat. First, it doesn’t matter what guitar you have. It doesn’t even matter if it has six strings on it. It’s all about heart. And timing, but mostly heart.
I said, “Well that’s good. I have a few guitars, and they are all strung up, and in tune.”
The sage told me, “Second, you need an old ....Marshall.... amp. It doesn’t have to have all its parts, but it has to work for at least thirty minutes. Then you need to play through some old speakers. It doesn’t matter what kind, or how many of them. They just need to be old.”
I said, “Well I think all of that is do-able. But anyone can do that. How do I get that great Beauville sound?”
The sage petted his really hot girlfriend/ fiancé, and told me, “First you must put the gain to where it’s just over the edge, and turn the reverb up to ten.”
“Ok, check.”
“Next you have to run a couple of pedals in-between your guitar and amp.”
“Ok, check.”
“The first pedal you want is an Electro Harmonix Holy Grail Reverb. Turn it up to ten.”
“Alright.”
“Next in the chain you want a Guyatone Reverb pedal. Make sure to turn it up to ten.”
“Um?”
“Then, you want to run it into a Boss Reverb pedal, and turn it up to ten.”
“Um, that seems like an awful lot of reverb.” I said.
“Silence!” He yelled. “You must not question the sage!” He then threw a beer bottle at me. His cat took off running. “Finally, you must move your entire rig into an empty bathroom.”
“Ok, I’ll bite. Why would I do that?”
The sage smiled. “Because.” He said. “It adds a natural reverb to your sound.”
I just stared at the sage. It was then that I made the decision, the greatest decision of my life. I said, “Ok, when do we start recording?”
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