Destruction for Life, Part 2

Mar 22, 2010

All the way back on May 20th of 2008 I wrote a blog entry about one of the most horrible human beings I have ever known.  (It was written under the title, "Destruction For Life.")

So here it is almost two years later, and I'm sure my readers are wondering why I am bringing this up again.  Well, let me start at the beginning.  I was coming back from the woodworking show with my girlfriend Roxy (not her real name.)  We were on US301 when I told her I wanted to stop in, and see an old friend.  We pulled into Sunset Memorial Gardens Cemetary.

Here is where my good friend Chris Camp is buried.  There is something that has never set right with me about his death.  I try to share everything I can with Roxy, and I thought this was something I needed to share with her.  Besides, I hadn't stopped in to visit Chris's grave in some time.  When I do, I always check in to make sure Chris's headstone is in good condition.  It and all the other gravestones were perfect.  Sunset Memorial Gardens always taken great care of their entire property.

After we had spent some time at Chris's grave, Roxy asked if we should visit the mausoleum.  I said in all the time I had been coming I had never been in it.  As we walked in I looked straight ahead, and that's when I saw it.  The spoiled grandson's tomb.  (Again, I won't use his real name due to privacy.)  There was a birthday card taped to it that started out, "Brother."  I said, well, it should be from his sister, (Again, I won't print her name.)  It was from her.

So all I could think was, "Well, there he lies good and dead.  Yet, I still feel no joy or relief."  Above him in the mausoleum were his Grandparents who were always good to me.   I knew they had passed away, but I didn't know when.  They both passed in 2005.  I knew Mr. _____ had passed away before Mrs. ______, but I didn't know they had passed in the same year.
I always made the crass comment that if I ever found out where he was buried I'd piss on his grave.  It feels a lot different now that I actually know where he is buried.  I can't "just say it."  It also feels different since his Grandparents are buried right above him.  They were very good to me.  They really, really liked me, and encouraged my education.  I just couldn't do anything morally wrong to the Scumbag's tomb with his Grandparents looking over me.

I have to think realistically.  He is dead.  Nothing will change that.  He was dead yesterday, and he'll be dead tomorrow.  In the end I have to understand that I can never get back at him for all the things he did to me.  I just have to know in my heart that I was and will always be a better person than him.  Also, I'm not a cokehead/ drunk driver/ scumbag, and at least I'm still alive.