The Mystery of Pie

There is a mystery in the house.  The mystery.... of pie!  No I'm not talking about a woman's private parts.  I'm actually taking about pie.  You know, apple, cherry, chocolate, blueberry, pumpkin pie.  Let me start at the beginning.

It was before Thanksgiving.  I went out to the garage freezer to bring in some meat and frozen vegetables for dinner.  That's when I saw this staring at me.

I came back inside and asked, "Why are there ten pies in the freezer?"

"It's for Thanksgiving!"  I was told.

That set my mind in gear.  Let's do the math.  There are four of us for Thanksgiving.  No one else has been invited.  I am not supposed to eat pie due to the high amount of sugar.  Now, I will have a piece here and there, but not a whole pie.  And definitely not 2.5 pies.

I presented my case about having that much pie.  I was told, "It's also for Christmas."

I thought, "Okay, I guess that makes some sort of sense?"

Over Thanksgiving five pies were cooked, so that made sense.  That is until I looked in the freezer today.

There are now seven pies in the outside freezer, plus I found another pie in the house freezer.  That means post-Thanksgiving, we are now at eight pies.  Ten pies minus five pies does not equal eight pies!!!

I know a lot of you think that I am the dumbass.  "Why are you complaining about pies, man?  There are so many other things you could complain about."

Here's the problem.  That many pies are taking up the space of other foods.  Things like vegetables.  Things I like such as chicken nuggets.  Actually anything else for that matter.  The freezer only contains a finite amount of space.  If it's 1/4 full of pie that takes away from other things that could be sitting in its place.

I just think something like one pie per person would be a much better ratio.  I think that would be the norm.  But that's just me.