WSTN

When I was younger I had a dream.  A dream to have my very own radio station.  It would not be just any rock radio station.  It would be WSTN, all Satan, all the time.  That's right, I would bring only the hardest, and awesomest death metal, grindcore metal, metal metal, etc.

Of course the main problem would not be the protesters.  No, those are always good for publicity.  It would be that blasted Clearchannel owns everything in the way of radio stations.  The FCC is not handing out any more licences since they say there are too many.  Of course, what they didn't say was that Clearchannel owns them all.

So what would we play?

Well obviously....

I would have different rock shows during the day.  Some mainstream, some punk, some unheard of stuff.  But we would always answer the phones saying this,

"Hail Satan, caller what's your name?"

Then they would say, "Dude my name is Bob, hail Satan!"

"Hail Satan Bob!"

But lets be honest, I know who 90% of the audience would be.

But what would make this job totally worth it?  Well, that would be the other 10%

Also known as "Metal Chicks."

Let's be honest, metal chicks are crazy.  But they are also crazy in bed .... and other places.  

I know the old saying, "It used to be about the music, man!!!!!"  And in the end it would have been about the music.  That is of course, if Clearchannel didn't own everything.

Here's one last really weird fact.  There really is a WSTN.  Here's the Wiki page on it, word for word.  (And I am really not making this up.)

WSTN (1410 FM) was an American radio station formerly licensed to serve Somerville, the county seat of Fayette County, Tennessee. The station was established in 1983 as "WJED", changed to "WSTN" in 1986, and since 2002 its broadcast license was held by Jimmy Swaggart's Family Worship Center Church, Inc. The station went silent on October 25, 2006.