Laser Eyes!

I have needed corrective lenses to see correctly since I was nine years old.  As I have gotten older my vision has become even worse.  Let's be honest, my vision sucked back then, and has really sucked these last ten years.  I wore contacts for a long time, but gave them up in 2006.  I still wasn't happy having to wear glasses if I wanted to see anything that was more than six inches from my nose.  So in 2006 I started looking into LASIK.

You know all those, "Get LASIK now for $250 advertisements?"  Yeah, I don't know anyone who would qualify for those.  Back in 2006 the estimated cost for having the procedure on both eyes was around a total of $5,000.  There was no way I could swing that back then, so I never thought about having the procedure done until recently.

Lately I have become more financially stable, so I visited a doctor affiliated with Lasik Plus+ to see if I still qualified for LASIK.  Long story short, yes I did.  So after talking to the financial side of Lasik Plus+, I found that the prices had come down quite a bit from over a decade ago.  We agreed on a price, so it was time for me to receive, "LAZER EYEZ!"

Now here is the official version of how LASIK works.

But I'm going to tell you what happened to me.  First, they give you a valium to calm your nerves.  I'm someone who strongly reacts to medication so I was worried about taking 1 MG of valium, and having it mix with my other medications.  The doctor said there would be no interference.  So I took the valium, and... I got dizzy.  

No, I did not calm down like I was supposed to.  I just got dizzy.  It didn't really take the edge off.  In fact, it didn't do anything other than like I said before, make me dizzy.  I guess I'm used to stronger stuff like, I don't know, Benadryl.  

The next thing they do is put numbing drops in your eyes.  Again, I really think they should have doubled up on the numbing drops because while it made my eyes feel funny, it didn't really numb them that much.  If the machine is going to be drilling into my eyeballs with a laser I really think I should at least be afforded some really strong numbing eye drops.  

So I always wondered how they kept a person's eyelids open during surgery.  Remember the movie, "A Clockwork Orange?"  Yeah, it's exactly like that.  It's also as painful as it looks.

Next, the machine vacuum sucks your eyeball to get a grip on it.  Believe me, with the grip the machine has on your eyeball, your eyeball isn't going anywhere.  And yes, it hurts as bad as you think it will.  

Luckily the procedure doesn't take long.  They like to say, "You'll be seeing halos for a while."  What they mean is everything looks like it has a milky finish on it.  If you imagine life like a photograph, look at that photograph and pour milk over it.  That's what everything looks like. 

Note:  It does get better over time.  Certain things like TV, smartphone, and computer screens are tough to look at for a while.  Just remember to constantly use your eyedrops like you're told to.

After the procedure they recommend sleep.  They say, "There will be discomfort."  What they mean is it will hurt way too much to even open your eyes.  I came home, and slept for six hours straight.  After that I felt much better.  The worst of the pain is in the first four hours.

Note:  When they say you will need someone to drive you to and from your appointment they are not kidding.  Again, I couldn't even open my eyes.

But they do give you some nice looking 80's sunglasses sit tight against your skin.  That way it keeps out a lot of light.  They look kind of like this.

The one thing they didn't tell me about was "bruising."  Okay, they did mention there "might" be some.  What they didn't say was that it was going to look more like this.

It's been a week, and I still have bruising on both eyeballs.  It will go away eventually.  I just wish I had known a little more about it than I was told.  

The other story about my bad eyesight was this, I knew I needed reading glasses even before LASIK.  Now, I really need them to see anything up close.  So, I've done away with my regular frames, and have upgraded (downgraded?) to old man reading glasses.

Overall I am happy I had the procedure.  I suspect I'll be happier as my eyesight clears up.  I am seeing 20/20 our of both eyes, but everything is still somewhat milky.  Although it's not as bad as it was a few days ago.  I still keep trying to push my "not there" glasses up my nose.

My main goal in posting this blog post was to fill in some of the gaps of information potential patients would want to know.  So I hope this helps out a few folks.  Just remember two things.  It's going to hurt (they do call it surgery,) and see if they have a special on the lifetime LASIK plan.