The Worst Patient: Mr. Tough Guy

To completely understand this post, it may help to not only read one, but two of my previous posts.

This was written four months ago when I broke my hand.

http://angjellockheart.blogspot.com/2018/04/i-joined-fight-club.html

The following post I wrote eight years ago.  In it, I talk about how even at a young age I would not cry in front of a woman despite feeling pain.

http://angjellockheart.blogspot.com/2011/02/measure-of-man.html

Now, onto the beginning of my new blog post.

I am the worst patient.  Not because I complain.  No, it's because I do the opposite.  You see, I broke my hand four months ago.  Normally it would be healed by now, but because I carry a genetic disease, (Dupuytren's Contracture Syndrome) I needed to go to physio-therapy to straighten the muscles and soft tissue in my hand.
Here's the Wiki page on Dupuytren's.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dupuytren%27s_contracture

So I've been going to physio-therapy once a week to straighten out the muscles and tissue in my hand.  The therapist I am seeing (I'll call her PT so as not to print her real name) is gorgeous.  She's so nice, has huge blonde curls, and a tiny nose ring.  I won't post a picture of her, but imagine something like this.

This leads to the guy problem of never admitting you're in pain in front of a woman.  Our conversation goes something like this:

(PT bends my pinky back.  It hurts pretty good since it doesn't want to bend that way.)

PT:  I'm not hurting you am I?

Adrian:  Nah, I'm doing great!

PT:  Because it looked like you winced with pain.

Adrian:  No, I just thought I had to sneeze.

PT:  Because it's not supposed to hurt.  If it hurts it's not going to help you.

Adrian:  It's a little bit uncomfortable, but I wouldn't describe it as pain.

PT:  Well, let's not have it be uncomfortable either.

Adrian:  Tis but a flesh wound!

PT:  What?

Adrian:  You've never seen, "Monty Python and the Holy Grail?"

PT:  No, what is that?

Adrian, Well, pull up a chair and let me tell you all about it.


Seriously, I haven't acted this dorky around a beautiful woman since... middle school?  Yeah, this is totally a middle school crush.

Before anyone gets mad and thinks I'm bothering this poor gal, please note.  I have not said anything wrong, sexist, impolite, or uncomfortable.  I have not hit on her, or asked her out.  She is taken, and I respect that.  Like I said, it's just a bit of a crush.  (Cue the 80's middle school crush music!)

This situation reminds me of the movie "Spartacus" (The 1960 film.)  There's a scene in it where Spartacus has been wounded by a blow from a sword, and he is slowly bleeding out.  One of the veteran fighters tells him he has to seal the wound.  

That being done by inserting a sword in the burning coals of a fire until it glows red with unforgiving heat.  Then applying the sword to the wound to cauterize it.  Of course, to do it properly the veteran fighter had to hold it on the wound for five continuous seconds.

I have been burnt by hot metal before.  It's a pain like no one can prepare you for.  But the veteran has a plan for Spartacus to hold still for that long.  Instead of having four gladiators hold Spartacus down, he has one woman do it.  

This, of course, brings up the question, "How could one woman do what four gladiators could not?"  It's because a man won't cry, or yell in pain in front of a woman.  As I wrote in the blog from many years ago, I wouldn't cry in front of a female technician/nurse when I was eight years old.  Now-a-days as an adult, I won't admit pain in front of yet another female technician.  

So I realize I am going to have to be a little more honest with PT.  I am going to have to let her know that sometimes she bends my pinky back a little too far.  Sometimes my hand is a bit more tired than I let on.  But I won't tell her about my crush.  That I will keep secret.  (Except for posting it on the internet like a dork.)

All 80's Kids Dreaded... The Rappin' PSA

To this day I am still unnerved by it.  It was one of those things you knew were coming up in the commercial break, but could do nothing about.  The mute button hadn't been invented yet, you know.  That's right, it was the 80's Public Service Announcement.

And like a lot of commercials in the 80's they had a lot to say, but only 30 seconds to say it.  So they decided to "get with the times" and start rapping, err, rappin', about it.  I always dreaded when those PSA's would come on.  I know they were trying to be, "hip," but they were just embarrassing themselves.

Remember those G.I. Joe PSA's?  I must have seen every episode 200 times.  I knew every PSA by heart.  At least they didn't rap in those.

D.A.R.E. was always trying out things.  The best being the famous, "Your brain on drugs."  But for me, the snake man was just the best at being over the top.

Yes, this really aired.

Thank you D.A.R.E.

One of the worst... best?  Best of the worst?  Anyway, there was this one PSA called, "The Suicide Rap."  Of course, it should have more correctly been called, "The Anti-Suicide Rap."  I have looked for it, but can't find it.  I only saw it the one time, but it stuck in my mind.

I thought, "Oh no.  This is going to be bad."  And it was.  I didn't know what social anxiety was back then, but this gave it to me in bundles.

The lyrics were, (To the best of my recollection)

Your Mother, your Father,
Your Brother, Sister too.
Your teacher, preacher, councilor,
It don't matter who!

They were trying to say that you should talk to someone if you felt suicidal. The lyrics above were the chorus to it.  Why do I remember it after so many years?  Because the song was mostly chorus.  They really could have done a better job.  You know, write a few more lyrics?

Here's some of the great/terrible rappin' PSA's.

Never underestimate a deadline and a Casio keyboard.

Someone else had the same idea as me.  See, I'm not the only one who hated 80's PSA's.

Well at least I didn't have to worry about 80's PSA's once it flipped to 1990.  No, I then had to worry about 90's PSA's.  That, of course, deserves it's own blog post.

Get Cha' Pull,... This Floyd Rose Right Off Of This Guitar

To understand this post a little better, here's the original post I wrote when I bought this guitar:

http://angjellockheart.blogspot.com/2017/08/get-cha-pull-new-guitar-day-dixie-rebel.html

I like my Dean Dixie Rebel.  It's surprisingly lightweight, it has an awesome neck profile, and the pickups are awesome.  There is something that I really hate about it.  I don't like using the word, "hate," but I really hate the Floyd Rose tremolo that came on it.  I just can not keep the guitar in tune.

The Floyd Rose that comes standard on it is a "Licensed Floyd Rose" instead of a real one.  It also doesn't have a manufacturer's name on it, so that tells you how generic it is.  The one neat thing about the hardware on the Dixie Rebel is that, it comes in Black Chrome.  You don't see that very often.  

So I start searching the web about a replacement Floyd Rose.  I remember members of the Dean Guitars Forum saying how they really liked the Gotoh tremolos.  After searching Reverb.com I was lucky enough to stumble across a Gotoh Floyd Rose in "Cosmo Black."  I'm guessing "Black Chrome" is trademarked so they couldn't call it that.  But it was the same color.

I took a chance and ordered it, and this is what I received.

It's a perfect color match.  The kit came with posts, springs, and all the little parts.  Luckily, the Gotoh tremolo was a drop in replacement on the Dixie Rebel.  I didn't need to change out any of the other parts.  

There was one problem though.

The Dixie Rebel is a thin bodied guitar so the Floyd Rose stuck out the back too far.  I checked the Gotoh website, and found out they offer this Floyd Rose with smaller block.

https://g-gotoh.com/international/product/ge1996t.html

So I'm kind of stuck with this for now.

Let me think about this for a bit.  I may get back to you in …. Part 2!!!!  But for the time being the guitar is pretty cool.  It stays in tune much better, and I can do all sorts of Dimebag squealies.