Friday, March 14, 2014

Things Not To Let Your Boss Catch You Doing

This is an absolutely true story of one of the most embarrassing things I ever had a boss catch me doing.  It's taken me so long to write this story because honestly, I thought I'd written about it years ago.  I know there was a year or so where all I was writing was hilarious things that had happened to me.  So I'm surprised that I didn't write about this incident years ago.

Anyway, onto the story.

So there I was, stock crew for Pet Supermarket.  I would go to eight different stores over four days, and stock the stores.  It was really physical, and all the bosses of the stores hated us.  I don't think they had enough people, or gave us enough time to do the job, so we were the red headed, bastard, step-children of Pet Supermarket.

Anyway, I am at the store of my main boss Jessica.  She really hated us.  We were just an extra pain in her ass that she didn't need.  So it happened to also be the day that new animals had gotten delivered.  I went over to the octagon housing cage to look at all the new guinea pigs and rabbits.  It was then that my smart ass attitude got the better of me.

I grabbed one rabbit, and one guinea pig.

And I face them towards each other, and start doing the voices.

(For the guinea pig)  "Hi thar, I'm Mr. Gin Gin.  What's your name?"  (Note:  I was doing this voice out loud in a Foghorn Leghorn type of Southern accent.)

(For the rabbit)  "Hi thar yourself.  I'm Mr. Bun Bun.  (I did his voice in a very high pitch Southern accent.)

(Mr. Gin Gin)  "It's o' so nice to meet cha.  I hear they're doing wonderful things with carrots around these parts."

(Mr. Bun Bun)  "Well that's just wonderful.  I sure do love me some carrots."

Anyway, it went on like this for a bit until I looked up.  That's when I saw my Manager Jessica staring at me like I was nuts.  I didn't know what I was going to say.  I mean, what could I say?  Luckily she did a 180, and just walked away without saying one word to me.  And I really mean that.  She didn't talk to me for quite a while.  I'm still kind of embarrassed about it.

So remember kids, if you work in a pet store it's okay to talk to the animals.  It's just not okay for you to have the animals talk to each other. 

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