Sunday, February 27, 2011

How to Make a Black Metal Video - On the Cheap

Dec 31, 2009

Follow these easy steps to film your own black metal video.

1.  Remember the leather and facepaint.  It's not black metal without it.

2.  Use metal guitars (circa 1980.)  Kramers and B.C. Rich always work well.  Don't discout some of the crap that Guild made.  Those where some pointy guitars.

3.  Go to the woods.  Since you are on a very limited budget, go to the woods.

4.  Stand in mud/ muddy water.  It makes no sense, but it works.

5.  Film wildlife.  Nothing says black metal like a bird of prey.

6.  Forget the drummer.  You never see drums or the drummer in the video.  They just don't matter.

7.  Know a foreign language.  Remember 94% of black metal bands/ fans are in Upper Europe like Finland, Sweden, and whatever other countrys are up that way.

8.  Use bad lighting, or overexposed lighting.  More light makes you look blacker.

9.  If your budget affords it, have women run through the woods while the band chases them.  Rape/ torture/ death optional.

10.  Vampire fangs?  Nothing wrong with that.

11.  Remember, the only color that exists is black.  Mmmm, maybe red and silver.

12.  If your budget affords you blood, go for it.

13.  Don't forget to headbang... a lot!

14.  Fire is great, but gas or other flamables are expensive.  Get it on the first take.  Also, don't burn the woods down.

15.  Cloaks make you look mysterious.  Masks, shoulder pads with spikes, and wizard's staffs are ok too.

16.  Anger is the only emotion.  Satisfation is ok if there is rape involved.

17.  If you are using old equipment, it is ok to film in black and white.  Again, it makes you mysterious.

18.  If you can afford women in your video, don't forget the panty shot.

19.  Get up early, or stay up late.  Use the morning fog to your advantage.  It adds depth to your video.  It also makes up for the use of crappy filming equipment.

20.  It is not necessary to synch up the words with the film.  No one can understand what you are saying anyway, so don't worry about taking too many takes.

I hope these tips have helped you in your making of your black metal video. 

For reference:

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